Bridal registry tips and scams to avoid when buying wedding gifts

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Some department stores did not give us written documentation explaining policy on bridal registrations when we shopped for our wedding. Because of this, sales associates can (and did in our case) say whatever they want and claim later you misinterpreted them. Another problem you may find is sales associates in department store bridal registries for some reason had no grip on their pricing. There was no quick way for them to look up prices. That's pretty amazing since I could rattle off the top of my head the price of every bottle of wine and liquor in the wine shop I worked in during college.

It often takes wedding registry salespeople forever to lookup a price which they should know anyway, they blame the computer, they can't find the wedding china pattern in the price book. Call me old fashioned, but if I was a wedding registry sales clerk selling the same 20 china patterns from the same display case day in and day out for months at a time, I'd have all the information ready just in case on the off chance a customer were to ask me what the price was on an item in their registry. But that's just me.

Bridal Registry Place Setting Pricing Shell Games

To play the bridal registry place setting price game, you need to know the shifting definitions that some gift registry stores use. If you thought the car pricing game was a scam, wait until you see the suggested pricing games for China at wedding registries. Below is a description of different pricing terms, and how some wedding registry salespeople dance around the meanings:

Wedding Gift Registry Place Settings: How many pieces in the set?

There should be at least 5 pieces in a place setting. But verify that you and the salespeople at the wedding registry have the same definition for place setting to avoid ugly surprises after the wedding. Verify how many pieces are included in your place setting, what pieces they are, and for what price, and make sure it's in writing or they'll claim you misunderstood them. It's amazing how someone far less educated than you always assumes that you misread them. Sometimes they show several pieces on display, but only half those pieces form the actual store defined place setting, the other half of the items are a-la-carte. Verify a written description of what is included in a place setting. When you register online at Macy's wedding registry, or The Knot Wedding Shop this is not a problem, as everything is in black and white.

MSRP (Manufacturer's Suggested Retail Price)
This is just what it implies. It's a shame American businesses still insult shoppers with this terminology, it's a meaningless number. Typically, department stores advertise a price that is less than MSRP to make you think you are getting a good deal. We prefer "street price", or everyday price. BIG SCAM: When you see department stores advertising 50% off sales, your are typically not getting 50% off their normal price. In fact, most of the time you are getting no savings at all! You're getting 50% off the bogus MSRP price that most stores never charge anyway. Online gift registries of course have the price listed online.

Everyday "Low Price"
For lack of a better word. This is the price that department stores will have on the display shelves in their wedding registry and other departments. They may show the bogus MSRP price as a 'reference', and show their "everyday low price" to create the illusion that you are saving a lot of money. In reality, the price is not far from their competitor's price up the street, and usually more than a manufacturer's outlet store. Most department store bridal registries have similar "everyday low prices" on their china patterns. They all tout that their price is the best, when in reality all the local wedding registries might all be the same price.

It's all part of the "make the customer think they got a bargain" game. The bridal registry on the other side of the mall may have it even cheaper. "Everyday low price" should really be called "street price", or their normal selling price. Do not let your brain trick you with the word "low" in that phrase, it does not mean lowest price, it just means it's low compared to the mysterious virtual MSRP that most stores never sell it at anyway. The lowest price probably exists somewhere else, and unless you shop around, you'll never know. The prices are discounted from MSRP, but don't be blindly swayed by the everyday low price, just because it is far less than MSRP. Especially in Florida, many department stores and furniture stores love to skirt the law by claiming doing this in their ads:

This Week Only! 50% OFF!*

Then when you hunt for the asterisk, the fine print says "Savings based on MSRP. We never sell at MSRP". If truthfully written, their ads would really tell you this:

You're getting 50% off*. then look for the asterisk: *No you're not

How many people would buy then? It's misleading because if stores really don't ever sell at MSRP, then you're really not saving 50%. In fact we monitored many store sales inserts in the paper, and some prices never change, so it's really not a sale. You should be aware that with all sales weekly ads, especially with the hardware stores, just because you see some items discounted in price in that insert, does not mean the other items are on sale.

Watch out for the Department Store "Sales Price" signs:

This is where they get you brides if you are not paying attention. Browse the China at department store bridal registries and you'll see signs next to selected patterns that say "Sale 40% off". Well this "40% off" is usually off the overly inflated MSRP. In many cases, this so called sale price can be higher than the store's "everyday low price"! We see many examples of this so stay sharp. Watch the prices at all the stores for a month get familiar, watch for their pricing shell games, then go choose the wedding registry store you will sign with. As you browse at each of the china patterns to add to your wedding gift registry, ask the sales associate what price you are getting, and where it fits in the scheme of things. Is it everyday low price, sales price, or an MSRP? Will your guests be guaranteed and locked into price or will the price go back up between now and your wedding? Will they put it in writing? Where is their documentation explaining their bridal registry? One example, our china pattern is the Royal Doulton Biltmore. The MSRP was $185, which is ridiculous and of course nobody sells it for that, and the store's "everyday low price" was $119 per place setting.

The Major Brands
The well known brands of china that most people look for are Mikasa China, Lennox China, Noritake China, Waterford Crystal, and Wedgewood China. For cookware, popular names are Cuisinart and Calphalon. For flatware, Oneida is one of the biggest names. Some people go for sterling silver flatware, some go for stainless steel flatware.

CONSUMER ALERT

Here are scams that were tried on us at a famous department store wedding registry

They may tell you that your wedding guests can buy china for a low price, but they get charged MSRP
They pulled that on 2 of our guests and would not budge from the ridiculously overpriced $185 MSRP price even though they were reminded that we are registered there and were promised the $119 everyday low price. A contract would have come in real handy here. Contracts are good at jogging people's memory. The guests ended up not buying the china, and angered, they left the wedding registry, went to a competing department store to buy us a different gift. Good for them. I would have done the same. This scam is very easy for wedding registries to pull on your guests, because you can't be there to police them. This is just one group of wedding businesses that like to scam brides, whose attention is focused on the whole ethereal aura of their wedding, instead of watching whose got their claws in your purse. There's no pricing games online.

This is a big problem for many brides as up to 70% of the gifts in some weddings are not from the bride's wedding registry gift list. This means the newlywed couple is stuck bringing back a ton of gifts that they did not want. Why does this happen? The clerks make it seem like everything will be automatic and peachy. Too many of our guests told us they were frustrated dealing with the store, the clerks were too busy, they could not find any of the gifts, items had no pricing, the bridal gift registry had inaccurate counts, when people bought wedding gifts they were not deducted from the gift registry. When your wedding guests buy through your online Macys bridal registry, the items are automatically deducted from the gift registry. The complaints go on and on. Usually the guest just leaves, goes to a competing store and buys a stupid glass candle holder. Then you end up with a dozen stupid glass candle holders you never wanted that aren't on your bridal registry. Even worse, guests try to get the closest pattern of towels or dish ware off your wedding registry, and it just ends in disaster.

In the week of the wedding, different guests paid different amounts china patterns in our bridal registry. I refuse to believe the price changed on a daily basis, something was just plain wrong. We did not want our wedding guests to remember our wedding from getting ripped off buying us a gift. We had never seen the wedding registry at that store charge $185 for our pattern and we had been watching the price for several months. You can see why guests were insulted, others had just paid $119 for our settings only 2 days before. How do they get "every day low price" from the MSRP of $185? This is why we prefer the factory direct stores, they don't play shell games with the pricing, they just give you one honest to goodness low price. And they have plenty of sets in mint condition. Don't let department store wedding registry clerks dismiss the outlet stores as trash, and all defects, they are not. How could they say that when they probably never went into an outlet store?

Bridal registry salespeople tell you that the bride and groom can purchase china 10% off

They neglect to tell you the fine print. That's because there is sometimes no print to begin with, allowing them to make up their own verbal fine print on the fly. After the wedding I asked the sales clerk about my "10% discount on the china patterns", this lady who seemed not so bright 5 minutes before, suddenly became Johnny Cochran, contract lawyer, and informed me that I have to purchase the entire remaining items from our bridal registry list to qualify for the discount. Well heck, that's a lot of stuff to buy since our frustrated guests went elsewhere to buy most of our gifts. This is not what they told us months before when we first registered. Don't let this happen to you.

BridalTips.com Consumer Alert: When Is A China Sale Not A Sale?

When they put sale signs on selected china patterns to make you think you are getting a deal.
But alleged sale prices can turn out to be higher then their every day low prices!

How can this be? Our $185 Royal Doulton Biltmore had the store's everyday low price of $119. Three guests bought the place setting for $119 and I went in after the wedding to buy one also. I saw a "30% off sign" next to our pattern. Foolish me, I thought 30% off the every day $119, I would pay $83. The sales clerk said "Oh, no, that's 30% off the $185 MSRP". That's $129.50, more than their so called $119 "everyday low price"! When I complained loud enough she finally caved in and offered to sell them to me for the everyday low price of $119. But too angry, I left and paid $72 (40% less) over at the Royal Doulton outlet store at the Sawgrass Mills Mall. We bought more at the other Royal Doulton outlet store in Orlando when we went to Disney World a few months later. Go online where the pricing is known.

Why all the pricing shell games at wedding registries? They all know your wedding is a once in a lifetime event and that makes gouging justifiable. Sometimes the sales signs are a way for them to squeeze more profit out of you and your guests, while at the same time making you think you saved money. They have marketing people whose job it is to think of new ways to draw you into the store using advertising terminology that causes your brain to trick you. Every once in a while the Attorney General of your state steps in and fines a few of them, gives them a slap on the wrist, reads them the riot act on what they can and cannot say in the advertising, then forces them to sign an agreement promising they will never do it again, or else they will get another angry letter from the state Attorney General. The whole charade is a joke. Until some cake eating marketing VP at one of these companies is sent away for some serious jail time, these scams will go on indefinitely.

Issues you may face while shopping for your bridal registry:

They don't tell you the stores keep no stock of china
When I wanted to buy a place setting from the wedding registry, they told me it would be 6 weeks! I had to keep interrogating her, why don't you have stock? Why don't the other stores have stock? Why does your central warehouse not have stock? I was asking the same questions from different angles before she admitted the stores do not keep any stock. Not that this is necessarily a bad thing, but what if a guest showed up at the last minute to buy a setting and wanted to give it to you at the wedding? Ask your sales clerk how many place settings are in stock when you are there. At least if you go to a factory outlet store, they have the stock. Don't waste the time of your wedding guests. Let them order your china and other wedding gifts off your online wedding registry from the store you choose.

When your wedding guests shop the store to buy your gifts, items on your bridal registry won't be found
This was a huge source of frustration for our family. I went with my sisters to the wedding registry to buy some of the gifts. But not one item on the list was in stock. Not one single item on a 2 page list. The salespeople were not much help either on a busy Saturday. It took them longer than it took us to determine the items just were not there. We only registered 4 months before, how could they not be there? We ended up helping my sisters choose alternate gifts for us. This may happen to you, so try to find out if the items you choose will still be there when your guests go shopping for them. Usually wedding registry salespeople wont know, they are just pawns in the vast retail game. If they really had any insight into the bigger picture of inventory, they would not be sales clerks; they would be buyers or managers. We learned our lesson. Don't register until 1-2 months before the wedding. Inventory changes rapidly so don't register too long in advance, the items may not be there the week of your marriage.

Bridal registry service is usually slow, avoid them on Saturdays and Sundays
I know it sounds like we are whining. They sell the China and glassware every day so why don't they know the prices, and why can't they find them when guests print out the list to buy the gifts? Saturdays and Sundays are the worst days to go, because they are packed with guests buying gifts for the day's wedding, all of whom are vying for the sales clerk's attention. Then you have other brides who want to register and you usually see a few pairs of brides and moms looking very impatient, and there is no where to sit down, and feet get sore. Every single time we've been to a registry at a store we hear some woman either swearing out loud that there's no help, or they are yelling at the help for being no help. Sometimes there's only one or two wedding registry sales clerks running all over the place, and if they were more organized, they might be able to answer questions in a timely manner. Forget about the stores hiring more sales people, retail America is down sizing to save money. Your best bet is to go register online first, then go in on a week night or afternoon, or best case, opening time during the week. If you must go on the weekend, visit when the store opens. Call ahead to see if you need an appointment first. You would hate to drive out there to find the "Bridal Consultant" at the wedding registry is out today.

What can you do to turn the wedding registry tables in your favor?

It's not all doom and gloom. Register with online sites, where it's all in writing, the guest sees one price on the screen that does not change at the whim of a salesperson, it's easier, and saves your guests time and money.

Ask the store for a written policy.
Now you won't be stuck with any empty verbal promises. If there is a problem, you will always have something in writing to fall back on that they cannot get out of. If they quote you a price for the china, get it in writing. If they say the bride gets a discount, get all the details in writing. If they don't give you anything in writing, go to a store that will, or try the online sites. If they say they don't have a written policy, then run, don't walk out of there now! How can you trust a business with a $5000 registry for goods and services if they don't have a contract? Quite simply, you can't. It does not matter how big or reputable the store is, or that they have been doing it like this for years with no problems, get it in writing.

Shop in advance before you register.
The bride and groom should spend a Saturday going to 3-5 department store wedding registries, just to get a feel for what they want together, and price the expensive items they want like china and cookware. Once you know the general pricing and who has the best price, that's the store to thing about registering with. You should also choose your pattern before you go to register so your appointment will go quick and smooth. Try to know in advance which items you'll want on your gift list.

Try to negotiate prices and have them put in writing.
Some stores my be running promotions, and you will want to lock in the price. Maybe if you offer to purchase a minimum number of place settings they will cut you a better deal on pricing.

If your registry or department store is dishonest don't sign up. Register for china in an outlet store.
After our bad experience, we went to the Royal Doulton factory outlet store and bought more of our place settings for $72, including tax. This applies to other manufacturers like Mikasa, Waterford, etc. If you have outlet malls nearby, I bet you'll find a factory outlet store. Here in Fort Lauderdale the Sawgrass Mills outlet mall has Royal Doulton, Mikasa, and Waterford Wedgewood. Near Disney World in Orlando off the turnpike are factory outlets, and many other outlet malls probably cover all the manufacturers, several blocks of outlet stores that have china outlets too. Some items supposedly did not make the grade from the factory (that's why they are in the outlet stores). But we had no problem at all finding the our last 3 place settings in perfect shape, plus additional a-la-carte items that were half the cost of the department store. So if department store clerks pull their mind tricks on you and tell you that the outlet stores have all flawed china, and you won't be able to complete your set, they are lying big time. All of our pieces were in mint condition, and yes the outlet stores do have some items with a small imperfection, but they are usually on the bottom, and small enough that you really have to search to see them. But most of their stuff is in mint condition, or just plain old closeouts, and it's easy to complete your set. Register your china in the outlet stores, and register the rest of your wish list of gifts in the department stores. You'll save your guests lots of money, headaches, and you may end up with more place settings.

Use gift money to go buy your china after the wedding
Don't register for china at all, and use the gift money from the wedding to go to an outlet store afterwards to buy whatever china you want, at half the department store price!! Man, I'm a genius! Or is it genuine ass? Of course, I still think you're better off putting that money to work in an investment account and buy a house with it later on.

Try registering at Target Bridal Registry or similar discounted stores
Many of these stores have bridal registries now. They sell plenty of kitchen utensils that are of competing quality with department stores. Home Depot is very practical as many couples are moving into their first house, and could use a bunch of tools, or garden supplies, tiles, carpeting, etc. Also try the bath bed beyond bridal registry.

Watch for genuine sales at the department store you registered in
If you see them have the word spread tactfully amongst your guests that now is the time to go buy from you wedding registry.

Ask for gift certificates.
Many times the guests cannot find items on your registry and a gift certificate really takes the pressure off them. Then you can go buy what you want when it goes on sale.

Don't register until 2-3 months before your wedding.
This will reduce the chances of the store not having items on your list when the guests go to buy your gifts. Don't worry about guests that will go to buy gifts 3 months before the wedding because that just does not happen. Most guests wait until the day before the wedding, or the day of the wedding on their way to the ceremony to buy the gifts anyway, so 60 days is plenty of time.

Remember our motto, if they don't put it in writing, it means they won't do it!

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All About Online Bridal Registries

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